Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing: A Memoir (Hardcover)

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Growing up in this crazy place we call Earth, we tend to look for others who we feel like we can relate to. We look to them for guidance, love and advice on how to navigate through life. Sometimes that person may be a teacher, a grandparent, even a coworker and sometimes it may even be a character on a television show. That person for me was Chandler Bing, the late actor Matthew Perry. He was the character you could always count on to be there for you through and through. He was our friend when we needed him. And he needed a friend at a point or two on his own.

Matthew Perry is best known for his lovable, awkward persona of Chandler Bing and quickly rose to be a household favorite from the hit  tv sitcom, Friends (1994-2004). Could he be anymore relatable?

The memoir, Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing written by Matthew Perry, was released November 1st, 2022. Matthew talks about his lifelong battle of addiction and his struggle to making it big in Hollywood.

At a very young age, Matthew struggled with divorcing parents and the feeling of that he was never good enough for anyone. He would touch on the subject in his memoir about how he felt it was so important to make people laugh. “To me, I felt like I was going to die if they didn’t laugh.” He felt that he needed to show that he could do something of importance to others and that he was validated.

I was very eager to read this memoir. As someone who grew up on the show and was heartbroken by the news of his passing, I wanted to read this book as a form of closure in a way. I was reminded how we all go through difficult parts of life and find it sometimes hard to get through the day. Perry reminded me that it’s not about where you end up, it’s how hard you work to fight your battles and come out stronger in the end. “I am filled with, energized by, the 'difference'… As I stand there, coffee in one hand and nothing in the other, and watch the distant waves in the ocean, I am realizing that I am feeling a wave of my own, inside me. Gratitude.”

— Nikki Maples



The BELOVED STAR OF FRIENDS takes us behind the scenes of the hit sitcom and his struggles with addiction in this “CANDID, DARKLY FUNNY...POIGNANT” memoir (The New York Times)

A MOST ANTICIPATED BOOK by Time, Associated Press, Goodreads, USA Today, and more!

“Hi, my name is Matthew, although you may know me by another name. My friends call me Matty. And I should be dead.”

So begins the riveting story of acclaimed actor Matthew Perry, taking us along on his journey from childhood ambition to fame to addiction and recovery in the aftermath of a life-threatening health scare. Before the frequent hospital visits and stints in rehab, there was five-year-old Matthew, who traveled from Montreal to Los Angeles, shuffling between his separated parents; fourteen-year-old Matthew, who was a nationally ranked tennis star in Canada; twenty-four-year-old Matthew, who nabbed a coveted role as a lead cast member on the talked-about pilot then called Friends Like Us. . . and so much more.

In an extraordinary story that only he could tell—and in the heartfelt, hilarious, and warmly familiar way only he could tell it—Matthew Perry lays bare the fractured family that raised him (and also left him to his own devices), the desire for recognition that drove him to fame, and the void inside him that could not be filled even by his greatest dreams coming true. But he also details the peace he’s found in sobriety and how he feels about the ubiquity of Friends, sharing stories about his castmates and other stars he met along the way. Frank, self-aware, and with his trademark humor, Perry vividly depicts his lifelong battle with addiction and what fueled it despite seemingly having it all.

Friends, Lovers, and the Big Terrible Thing is an unforgettable memoir that is both intimate and eye-opening—as well as a hand extended to anyone struggling with sobriety. Unflinchingly honest, moving, and uproariously funny, this is the book fans have been waiting for.

About the Author

Matthew Perry was a Canadian American actor, executive producer, and playwright.

Praise For…

"Remarkable, startling, and heartfelt...The bravery of Perry’s book is not just in what he says, or how he says it, and how unflinching he is in his commitment to say it, but that he chose to say it at all." GQ

Candid, darkly funny…starkly chronicling his decades-long cage match with drinking and drug use. Perry writes gratefully and glowingly…fans will find poignant nuggets in its pages.” The New York Times

“A heartbreakingly beautiful memoir.” People

"Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing is a raw, unflinching memoir that took courage to write. As it turns out, Matthew Perry has a lot of courage. He takes us through his addiction, his illness and his paralyzing loneliness. Somehow, during the course of his life, Matthew was able to turn his pain into comedic joy for others, but, he tells us, it was at a cost. Matthew takes us through his “hell” but doesn’t wallow. Ultimately, this book is filled with hope for the future. If you want to know about who Matthew Perry is, stay away from the rags and read this." —Marta Kauffman, co-creator of the NBC sitcom Friends

Product Details
ISBN: 9781250866448
ISBN-10: 1250866448
Publisher: Flatiron Books
Publication Date: November 1st, 2022
Pages: 272
Language: English